• FG V18I2 Pg 8 of 17

    From Sean Dennis@1:18/200 to All on Mon Jan 24 16:03:12 2022
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    NET HUMOR
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    Dad Jokes
    By Sean Dennis, 1:18/200

    If you didn't know, I love puns and what is now called "dad jokes".

    The more groans I get from a joke, the more amusing it is to me.

    So here to ruin, I mean, make your day, may I present some stinkers:

    ==
    Q: What's the best thing about Switzerland?
    A: I don't know but the flag is a big plus.
    ==
    Q: Why do we tell actors to "break a leg"?
    A: Because every play has a cast.
    ==
    I have a stepladder because my real ladder left when I was just
    a kid.
    ==
    I visited my friend at his new house. He told me to make myself at
    home. So I threw him out as I hate having visitors.
    ==
    "Knock knock."
    "Who's there?"
    "Control freak."
    "Con..."
    Okay, now you say "Control freak who?"
    ==
    The guy who stole my diary just died.
    My thoughts are with his family.
    ==
    To the person who stole my antidepressants: I hope you're happy.
    ==
    Q: Why did the chicken go to the seance?
    A: To get to the other side.
    ==
    Q: Why did the chicken cross the road?
    A: To get away from Colonel Sanders.

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    Thought Of The Week
    By Sean Dennis, 1:18/200

    "It is better to keep your mouth shut and be thought a fool than to
    open your mouth and remove all doubt."

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    FGAZ 18-02 Page 8 24 Jan 2022


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  • From Daryl Stout@1:2320/33 to Sean Dennis on Tue Mar 1 14:19:00 2022
    Sean,

    Q: Why do we tell actors to "break a leg"?
    A: Because every play has a cast.

    The truth of that is that they believe wishing someone "good luck" is actually bad luck. That's why they say "break a leg"...and having been
    in theatre arts (drama) in high school and college, I can verify that.
    I'm also a life member of The International Thespian Society...named
    after the Greek actor Thespis.

    No, I did NOT say "The International Lesbian Society"...but like GOLF originally stood for "Gentlemen Only Ladies Forbidden", this turnabout
    is foreplay (pun intended). <G>

    I have a stepladder because my real ladder left when I was just
    a kid.

    Talk about family neglect...one step at a time. <G>

    I visited my friend at his new house. He told me to make myself at
    home. So I threw him out as I hate having visitors.

    Fish and visitors stink after 3 days -- Benjamin Franklin.

    The guy who stole my diary just died.
    My thoughts are with his family.

    I think you may be on to something...but I need to think about this. ;)

    To the person who stole my antidepressants: I hope you're happy.

    I got my Preparation H and PoliGrip mixed up, but at least my gums don't
    itch anymore. <G>

    Q: Why did the chicken cross the road?
    A: To get away from Colonel Sanders.

    Two ladies were talking about the one's hen (named Henrietta, of course),
    and one told the other "When she quits laying eggs, we'll kill her and eat her".

    So, in the next picture, you see Henrietta in the checkout line at the grocery store, and the cashier asks "Another 2 dozen eggs, Henrietta??".

    And, THAT'S why the chicken crossed the road. <G>

    "It is better to keep your mouth shut and be thought a fool than to
    open your mouth and remove all doubt."

    In the old days, it was considered a miracle for an ass to speak. Now, it would be one if one kept his mouth shut. <G>

    Daryl

    ... I may not always be right, but I'm never wrong.
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