• a very task oriented pers

    From Arelor@VERT/PALANT to Moondog on Tue Sep 20 13:45:49 2022
    Re: a very task oriented pers
    By: Moondog to MRO on Mon Sep 19 2022 10:15 pm

    Re: a very task oriented pers
    By: MRO to Ogg on Mon Sep 19 2022 02:58 pm

    Re: a very task oriented person
    By: Ogg to Arelor on Mon Sep 19 2022 08:00 am

    Open your mind to the possibility of meeting someone
    spontaneously whilst doing something else: shopping,
    travelling, etc. That person could very well make a good
    difference in your life.


    i'm sure approaching someone when they are shopping is totally NOT creepy.

    also traveling alone is creepy.

    My aunt is a very social person. One time I flew with to a wedding in New York, and during the holdovers in between fights we'd stop in a bar and find a random person to talk to. She used to be a social worker, and could read people pretty well. She would find somethin interesting about what the person is wearing, or maybe it's their age (she liked to help keep an eye on y
    oung people traveling) and talk to make time pass. Part of this might've bene done to calm her nerves, since she hated the moment before boarding the plane. The conversation was small talk, nothing giving away personal information or anything current or relevant.

    Regarding shopping, talking to a person in a grocery store feels odd. In a department or specialty store, it is different because the conversation can be more specific. A good comparison is the bar, because you at least know the person has drinking or hanging out in common. I was amazed of how many women visit a gun shop or shooting range (and are single.)

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    There is a difference between sparking up some friendly talk with somebody you are
    supposed to be talking to, and trying to get a conversation started out of the blue.
    Big difference.

    See, if I go order a burger from the local bar, and the bar is not very busy at that
    our, and I bring some subject up with the barman as he prepares the burguer, that is
    not creepy.*

    If I go to Logistics with a bulk of packages and bring some spontaneous conversation
    with the counter guy as he labels the packages and places them in the conveyor belt,
    that is not creepy.*

    If you go to a bar and walk to a random guy and start talking about the weather, that
    is very, VERY WHAT THE FUCK.

    *Asuming the conversation does not distract people from their task, obviously.

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  • From Ogg@VERT/CAPCITY2 to Moondog on Tue Sep 20 23:56:00 2022
    Hello Moondog!

    ** On Monday 19.09.22 - 22:15, Moondog wrote to MRO:

    Regarding shopping, talking to a person in a grocery store
    feels odd. In a department or specialty store, it is
    different because the conversation can be more specific. A
    good comparison is the bar, because you at least know the
    person has drinking or hanging out in common. I was amazed
    of how many women visit a gun shop or shooting range (and
    are single.)

    Talking in a grocery store to people feels odd but not in a gun
    shop? There HAS to be some extensive talking beyond personal
    ID to know if the women are single. :D

    My point is that ANY chance meeting anywhere can evolve into
    purposeful meetings somewhere else if you let it (like a
    hobbiest group that two people share interest in, or an evening
    college class).

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  • From Moondog@VERT/CAVEBBS to Arelor on Wed Sep 21 14:37:00 2022
    Re: a very task oriented pers
    By: Arelor to Moondog on Tue Sep 20 2022 01:45 pm

    Re: a very task oriented pers
    By: Moondog to MRO on Mon Sep 19 2022 10:15 pm

    Re: a very task oriented pers
    By: MRO to Ogg on Mon Sep 19 2022 02:58 pm

    Re: a very task oriented person
    By: Ogg to Arelor on Mon Sep 19 2022 08:00 am

    Open your mind to the possibility of meeting someone
    spontaneously whilst doing something else: shopping,
    travelling, etc. That person could very well make a good difference in your life.


    i'm sure approaching someone when they are shopping is totally NOT cre

    also traveling alone is creepy.

    My aunt is a very social person. One time I flew with to a wedding in N York, and during the holdovers in between fights we'd stop in a bar and f a random person to talk to. She used to be a social worker, and could re people pretty well. She would find somethin interesting about what the person is wearing, or maybe it's their age (she liked to help keep an eye oung people traveling) and talk to make time pass. Part of this might've bene done to calm her nerves, since she hated the moment before boarding plane. The conversation was small talk, nothing giving away personal information or anything current or relevant.

    Regarding shopping, talking to a person in a grocery store feels odd. In department or specialty store, it is different because the conversation c be more specific. A good comparison is the bar, because you at least kno the person has drinking or hanging out in common. I was amazed of how ma women visit a gun shop or shooting range (and are single.)

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    There is a difference between sparking up some friendly talk with somebody y supposed to be talking to, and trying to get a conversation started out of t Big difference.

    See, if I go order a burger from the local bar, and the bar is not very busy our, and I bring some subject up with the barman as he prepares the burguer, not creepy.*

    If I go to Logistics with a bulk of packages and bring some spontaneous conv with the counter guy as he labels the packages and places them in the convey that is not creepy.*

    If you go to a bar and walk to a random guy and start talking about the weat is very, VERY WHAT THE FUCK.

    *Asuming the conversation does not distract people from their task, obviousl

    --
    gopher://gopher.richardfalken.com/1/richardfalken

    Initiating contact for random conversation doesn't have to be creepy. If the TV is on at the bar and someone else is watching, whatever is on the screen can be used to start a conversation. You look for a common thread or point
    of discussion and you get a response, or you don't. If you're in a place you've never been to before, asking a person next to you what is good on the menu or what is the place known for creates that opportunity.

    When I was younger I was shy and introverted. I'm still shy and introverted, however I had to learn as part of doing technical and customer support how to break out of my shell and talk to people. I notice there are occasions where getting the right answers back from a customer requires other questions. Making someone feel comfortable to confess they clicked on something without sounding judgemental is tricky. Admitting a screw up takes some courage. If you want something fixed, transparency towards why something is hosed up gets quicker results than playing 20 questions.

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  • From Moondog@VERT/CAVEBBS to Ogg on Wed Sep 21 15:33:00 2022
    Re: a very task oriented pers
    By: Ogg to Moondog on Tue Sep 20 2022 11:56 pm

    Hello Moondog!

    ** On Monday 19.09.22 - 22:15, Moondog wrote to MRO:

    Regarding shopping, talking to a person in a grocery store
    feels odd. In a department or specialty store, it is
    different because the conversation can be more specific. A
    good comparison is the bar, because you at least know the
    person has drinking or hanging out in common. I was amazed
    of how many women visit a gun shop or shooting range (and
    are single.)

    Talking in a grocery store to people feels odd but not in a gun
    shop? There HAS to be some extensive talking beyond personal
    ID to know if the women are single. :D

    My point is that ANY chance meeting anywhere can evolve into
    purposeful meetings somewhere else if you let it (like a
    hobbiest group that two people share interest in, or an evening
    college class).


    Even though this is the 21st century and times have changed, women shopping
    on their own in a gun shop is common, but still garners attention. Obviously they are either buying something for themselves, or they are buying something for a partner. If they frequent the shop or are avid
    shooters, there's less chance of dialog. If they're learning how to shoot or buying their first firearm, bringing up which caliber they prefer normally is followed by the mention of their partner having a hand cannon, and they are
    not comfortable with shooting their partner's hand me down gun. The reason
    why she is there by herself is if she brought him with, he would buy himself
    a new gun and give her the gun with uncontrollable recoil and a muzzle blast that jars teeth loose.

    If there is no mention of a partner, chances are she is there for herself,
    and there is no mention of a partner or significant other.

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  • From Moondog@VERT/CAVEBBS to Arelor on Wed Sep 21 15:46:00 2022
    Re: a very task oriented pers
    By: Arelor to Ogg on Wed Sep 21 2022 07:48 am

    Re: a very task oriented person
    By: Ogg to Arelor on Tue Sep 20 2022 11:47 pm

    I knew a friend who consistently failed with establishing a GF.
    His modus operandi was to get a girl for a wife and have kids,
    and he said that he threw that question out there early in the
    dating game. And he wondered why he rarely got a 2nd date.


    Well, if you are trying to sell a product, you first have to convince the bu the product is awesome, and you only talk about the price once the buyer is purchase the product (unless the product's selling point is the price itself

    You sure as heck don't try to sell yourself by stating your price upfront, s if it is not a cheap price.

    Girls do this all the time, on the other hand, which is a blessing, because you to kick them off the list early.

    --
    gopher://gopher.richardfalken.com/1/richardfalken


    Back in the days people placed ads in personal ads and dating sections of newspapers and dating services, some would mention they are looking for long term relationships and possible marriage to turn away others looking for
    random casual sex. Best advice is be honest, but avoid looking desperate and clingy.

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  • From Arelor@VERT/PALANT to Moondog on Thu Sep 22 13:34:18 2022
    Re: a very task oriented pers
    By: Moondog to Arelor on Wed Sep 21 2022 03:46 pm

    Back in the days people placed ads in personal ads and dating sections of newspapers and dating services, some would mention they are looking for long term relationships and possible marriage to turn away others looking for random casual sex. Best advice is be honest, but avoid looking desperate and
    clingy.


    There is a paradox there.

    You cannot be honest if you are desperate, because then you will inevitably show you
    are desperate and lose. You either act sly and ensure nobody sees you bleeding (which
    is a good policy in life, actually) or you stop being desperate in the first place.

    I guess that for an actual desperate person, it is very hard to switch desperation
    off. Desperation in general is rooted in many factors that are not easy to change. It
    is easy to tell people not to be desperate, but if the reason they are desperate is
    they lack legs and arms and cannot get a job and they are having a bad time finding
    one, that is not getting an easy fix...

    Best advice is to become powerful enough so you can afford not to give a damn. ie. if
    you know how to bake your own apple pie, the need for having somebody besides you
    baking apple pie diminishes.

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  • From Moondog@VERT/CAVEBBS to Arelor on Fri Sep 23 09:48:00 2022
    Re: a very task oriented pers
    By: Arelor to Moondog on Thu Sep 22 2022 01:34 pm

    Re: a very task oriented pers
    By: Moondog to Arelor on Wed Sep 21 2022 03:46 pm

    Back in the days people placed ads in personal ads and dating sections of newspapers and dating services, some would mention they are looking for l term relationships and possible marriage to turn away others looking for random casual sex. Best advice is be honest, but avoid looking desperate clingy.


    There is a paradox there.

    You cannot be honest if you are desperate, because then you will inevitably are desperate and lose. You either act sly and ensure nobody sees you bleedi is a good policy in life, actually) or you stop being desperate in the first

    I guess that for an actual desperate person, it is very hard to switch despe off. Desperation in general is rooted in many factors that are not easy to c is easy to tell people not to be desperate, but if the reason they are despe they lack legs and arms and cannot get a job and they are having a bad time one, that is not getting an easy fix...

    Best advice is to become powerful enough so you can afford not to give a dam you know how to bake your own apple pie, the need for having somebody beside baking apple pie diminishes.

    --
    gopher://gopher.richardfalken.com/1/richardfalken


    The issue is not being desparate. It's looking or acting in a way that makes you appear desparate. Regardless of personal condition, you won't attract a m ate if you give them the vibe you are settling for whoever comes along.

    ---
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  • From Dumas Walker@VERT/CAPCITY2 to ARELOR on Fri Sep 23 16:30:00 2022
    I had to give the opportunity a pass and do some research in order to locate h
    elsewhere in a better moment. I am still wondering why that girl was playing w
    h her
    horse so late at night.

    If I saw that around here at 3am, I would think she was either on drugs or
    has a mental problem (bi-polar or borderline).


    * SLMR 2.1a * My other computer runs the Enterprise.

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  • From Nightfox@VERT/DIGDIST to Gamgee on Fri Sep 23 21:38:03 2022
    Re: Re: a very task oriented pers
    By: Gamgee to MRO on Fri Sep 23 2022 09:20 pm

    or walking around barefoot outside with a hammer.

    it could be i just am used to being up nights and i'm cleaning my
    basement or i'm trying to hunt a prowler.

    You're hunting a prowler with a hammer? LOL. Ever heard the phrase
    "Don't bring a knife to a gunfight"? Hahahaha

    You have a lot of prowlers? Is this something you do frequently? LMAO

    Barefoot too, apparently.. No time to even put on a pair of slippers or sandals when going outside..

    Nightfox

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  • From Gamgee@VERT/PALANT to Nightfox on Sat Sep 24 07:25:00 2022
    Nightfox wrote to Gamgee <=-

    or walking around barefoot outside with a hammer.

    it could be i just am used to being up nights and i'm cleaning my
    basement or i'm trying to hunt a prowler.

    You're hunting a prowler with a hammer? LOL. Ever heard the phrase
    "Don't bring a knife to a gunfight"? Hahahaha

    You have a lot of prowlers? Is this something you do frequently? LMAO

    Barefoot too, apparently.. No time to even put on a pair of
    slippers or sandals when going outside..

    Well, that way you can move around pretty much silently, ya know. You
    need every advantage you can get when engaging with "prowlers" - they're
    very crafty. Also, hammers are much quieter than guns.



    ... As a matter of fact, it IS a banana in my pocket.
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  • From Arelor@VERT/PALANT to Moondog on Sun Sep 25 07:02:27 2022
    Re: a very task oriented pers
    By: Moondog to MRO on Fri Sep 23 2022 10:00 am

    I disagree about deception. If someone is lying about simple things, what other false pretenses am I getting involved with?

    The issue here is that, in the end of the day, you are just selling a product (ie. You and hat you can do for the other person) and once you go into that territory, you need to hone your marketing skills.

    A big bunch of dating advice out there sounds like marketing classes to me, really. You need to hype the product so it looks better than it is. It can be done without lying, but if everybody else has marketing more aggressive than your's, you are going to have bad trouble selling your product.


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  • From Arelor@VERT/PALANT to Dumas Walker on Sun Sep 25 07:07:25 2022
    Re: a very task oriented pers
    By: Dumas Walker to ARELOR on Fri Sep 23 2022 04:30 pm

    I had to give the opportunity a pass and do some research in order to loca elsewhere in a better moment. I am still wondering why that girl was playi h her
    horse so late at night.

    If I saw that around here at 3am, I would think she was either on drugs or has a mental problem (bi-polar or borderline).



    Well, if I am having trouble sleeping or if I arrive late home, I usually check on the horses. Their sleep cycle is not like human's, so if you show up late they are likely to want some pats and play. I am certainly not judgemental there.

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  • From Arelor@VERT/PALANT to Gamgee on Sun Sep 25 07:15:25 2022
    Re: Re: a very task oriented pers
    By: Gamgee to Nightfox on Sat Sep 24 2022 07:25 am

    Well, that way you can move around pretty much silently, ya know. You
    need every advantage you can get when engaging with "prowlers" - they're very crafty. Also, hammers are much quieter than guns.


    If you go for stealth, what you must do is wear a nijna outfit and use shurikens instead. Just wearing a ninja bandana makes you ten times more stealthy.

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  • From Dumas Walker@VERT/CAPCITY2 to ARELOR on Sun Sep 25 09:25:00 2022
    If I saw that around here at 3am, I would think she was either on drugs or has a mental problem (bi-polar or borderline).

    Well, if I am having trouble sleeping or if I arrive late home, I usually chec
    on the horses. Their sleep cycle is not like human's, so if you show up late they are likely to want some pats and play. I am certainly not judgemental there.

    I was going more with what kind of people are around this area and not
    being judgemental of people out late as a whole. If I had animals, I would probably check on them, too, under such circumstances.


    * SLMR 2.1a * Farewell, friend. I was 1000 times more evil than thou.

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  • From Moondog@VERT/CAVEBBS to Arelor on Sun Sep 25 11:13:00 2022
    Re: a very task oriented pers
    By: Arelor to Moondog on Sun Sep 25 2022 07:02 am

    Re: a very task oriented pers
    By: Moondog to MRO on Fri Sep 23 2022 10:00 am

    I disagree about deception. If someone is lying about simple things, wha other false pretenses am I getting involved with?

    The issue here is that, in the end of the day, you are just selling a produc (ie. You and hat you can do for the other person) and once you go into that territory, you need to hone your marketing skills.

    A big bunch of dating advice out there sounds like marketing classes to me, really. You need to hype the product so it looks better than it is. It can b done without lying, but if everybody else has marketing more aggressive than your's, you are going to have bad trouble selling your product.


    --
    gopher://gopher.richardfalken.com/1/richardfalken


    That marketing angle is one of the reasons I do not use or trust dating services. I don't trust profile pictures to be up to date. My brother was using some site and since he's in his mid-40's he's getting some gray hair on his blond head and his facial hair is also turning. he was getting remarks back about looking like an old man, but these were from "girls" who were in their early or mid 20's. he got self conscious about it and tried the Just
    For Men hair dye for his beard and mustache, and went too dark. It looked ridiculous and friends and acquaintances spoke their mind and told him he
    looks good for being someone in the 40's already. i think he's been
    catfished a few times and was basing a date on a profile pic, then found the pic was from 10-15 years earlier before she became inactive or premature
    aging kicked in. Clever marketing does little if the product does not match the claims.

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  • From poindexter FORTRAN@VERT/REALITY to Ogg on Sat Sep 24 11:16:00 2022
    Ogg wrote to Moondog <=-

    Talking in a grocery store to people feels odd but not in a gun
    shop? There HAS to be some extensive talking beyond personal
    ID to know if the women are single. :D

    There was a gun shop in San Francisco, and I used to love browsing there. Never owned one myself. The clientele, however, were *incredibly* polite.



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  • From poindexter FORTRAN@VERT/REALITY to Arelor on Mon Sep 26 07:22:00 2022
    Arelor wrote to Moondog <=-

    A big bunch of dating advice out there sounds like marketing classes to me, really. You need to hype the product so it looks better than it is.
    It can be done without lying, but if everybody else has marketing more aggressive than your's, you are going to have bad trouble selling your product.

    Marketing (at least with regards to personal branding) is all about discovering a problem that the customer has, finding and fixing a customer's problem for a price, and picking a niche to make you the biggest player in
    the market - at least in the beginning.

    If your target niche is "Personal Companionship for Female Babylon 5 Cosplayers", good luck.


    ... Abandon desire
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  • From poindexter FORTRAN@VERT/REALITY to Arelor on Mon Sep 26 07:24:00 2022
    Arelor wrote to Dumas Walker <=-

    Well, if I am having trouble sleeping or if I arrive late home, I
    usually check on the horses. Their sleep cycle is not like human's, so
    if you show up late they are likely to want some pats and play. I am certainly not judgemental there.

    Dogs have a pretty solid sleep cycle that they'll interrupt when I get home. It's funny when one of them, a little terrier/chihuahua mix greets me at the door with bed head.


    ... Abandon desire
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  • From Arelor@VERT/PALANT to poindexter FORTRAN on Mon Sep 26 18:01:57 2022
    Re: Re: a very task oriented pers
    By: poindexter FORTRAN to Arelor on Mon Sep 26 2022 07:22 am

    Marketing (at least with regards to personal branding) is all about discovering a problem that the customer has, finding and fixing a customer's problem for a price, and picking a niche to make you the biggest player in the market - at least in the beginning.

    If your target niche is "Personal Companionship for Female Babylon 5 Cosplayers", good luck.

    Yes and no.

    The market is saturated to the point most problems in need for a solution are solved.
    Being able to provide a solution for a problem is no longer enough. You need to come
    across as the best problem solver for the price. That is actually harder than BEING
    the best problem solver for the price.

    At that stage you need to start playing with people's emotions because once all the
    technical caracteristics of the product and its value proposal are maxed, the only
    thing you can do is play mind tricks to stand out.

    Niches are becoming saturated themselves. Yesterday you could have a generalistic
    travel agency. Today you need a travel agency specialized in a given country. Tomorrow
    you need a travel agency that is centered on specific cities. There is only so much
    space in the market for general solutions anymore, but the niche space is becoming
    cramped. If it is profitable to dig up, it is being taken already.

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  • From Moondog@VERT/CAVEBBS to Hustler on Sun Jan 8 14:03:00 2023
    Re: a very task oriented pers
    By: Hustler to Nightfox on Sat Jan 07 2023 10:09 am

    Subject: a very task oriented person
    @MSGID: <63B9B548.52785.dove.dove-gen@realitycheckbbs.org>
    @REPLY: <63288CB9.67128.dove_dove-gen@digitaldistortionbbs.com>
    @TZ: 41e0
    Re: a very task oriented person
    By: Nightfox to Ogg on Mon Sep 19 2022 08:37 am

    Open your mind to the possibility of meeting someone
    spontaneously whilst doing something else: shopping,

    Maybe it's the area I live in, but people here generally don't talk to ot shoppers while shopping. But different activities can lend themselves to

    If I tried to speak to woman while shopping I'd get the "who are you weirdo

    ... Have you ever asked a question you weren't supposed to ask?


    I have had people introduce themselves to me before asking questions. They were working for the local region newspaper, trying to the "man on the street"
    type opinions. Otherwise I get stopped by tourists asking directions to a nearby winery or distillery.

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